Guess who got fat, hairy, and lazy?

You know something's amiss when you notice your man boobs getting in the way of moving your arms. 227 is closer to 250 than 200. Really? At least Jackee' would approve of the number.

Um... yeah. More than a little overdue to get back on the program.

We'll see how it goes. Hopefully I won't resort to breaking out the electric carving knife.

To bag or not to bag?

Tomorrow morning I'll be competing, er, participating in the LA Triathlon. Didn't make it below a deuce but compared to last year I'm 20+ lbs lighter so that's a good thing.

One other thing that had me thinking a lot this week was the idea of going back on what I said last month and signing up for the Clydesdale division like last year. Despite being a member of the husky group, my time on the bike was good enough to crack the top 20 in the elite category.

Now, at a fly weight 207, I started having thoughts of grandeur. I could be the skinniest heavyweight and rule up on the Clydesdales because I did really well as an even tubbier bitch last year. Seriously, the level of comprehension needed to figure out the twisted logic of sandbagging the Clydesdales is a job only Carl Sagan can do. And he's dead.

Ultimately, I realized I've never been on to play in the sand so bucked up and registered with the skinny folk. We'll see how it goes tomorrow.

At least I'll have less backfat hanging out this year and if things go well, I won't get into a rasslin' match with my wet suit which ended with me covered in sand from head to toe looking like a giant powdered donut.

Note the backfat and residual sand.

Backfat is back...

No really, the backfat is back.

Um, what really can I do to get you up to speed on where I've been the last three months? The long boring, semi-complicated story is that I was just very busy; but do you know what would be much better?

A montage! Yes! Everything looks better as a montage.

Went on a snacking rampage.


Ate some pie. A lot of pie.


Drank enough Old Style to keep the Heilman kids in college.


Got a sweet new shirt.


Cheated death. Or at least avoided mild disaster.

Yeah, there'll be regular updates once again. Gotta start getting semi-serious about dropping the lbs once again. Signed up for the regular version of the LA Triathlon instead of the Clydesdale category just to try and step up the motivation.

We'll just have to see how that goes.

At this rate I'll be 199 by the 4th of July

Two weeks to lose 0.8lbs. Looks like it might be time to make the move to Air Crackers and Imaginary Cake.

Went racin' again this week and I'm starting to feel like I'm actually getting in shape. Funny how that works when you watch what you eat and ride with at least a semi-purpose.

Average wattage for the race was 279 only 3 watts less than last week but I felt much better- even finished close enough to smell the Top 10.

And on the bright side, I was able to not get taken to the woodshed by a 12 year-old so I've got that going for me.

I seriously think I've eaten cheeseburgers that weigh more than this kid.

On Mars .4lbs is like 20lbs.

Been a while since an update but hey, at least the good news is that while it might not be much (.4lbs in two weeks) at least we're a little little closer to the goal. At this torrid pace I should be there sometime before the end of the year. Let's hope not.

On the riding front is where the really good news can be found.

The last two weeks of racing have been the first two weeks where I've actually felt like I was racin' instead of just riding to survive. Guess that's what can happen if you start doing intervals on your own volition.

This week I didn't make it into a (failed) breakaway but I did spend the better part of an hour at the front of the peloton doing a big chunk of the work to chase down an 8 man break that just about stayed clear.

Trying to break the back of the peloton which was really more like giving it a noogie.

Despite feeling like my eyes were going to roll out of my head it felt good to be up at the front mixing it up. According to the ol' power meter, average wattage for the hour clocked in at a new record of 282 watts.

Maybe one of these days I'll develop an actual sprint.

"Charging" to the finish line. I'm the tubby guy hugging the curb on the far left.

Read it and weep, suckers...

Went racin' again last night and was able to launch not one but two failed breakaway attempts! Someone's starting to get in shape. Tee hee.

Average wattage for the hour race was a new record too- 250 watts.

Only 20 more to go...

Woke up officially 20lbs lighter. Been fighting a Chipotle' craving for 3 days too. Still, I think I cracked the code to losing weight. You just have to make sure you go to bed hungry.